Agony Aunt Required

Dear Agony Aunt,

On seeing your advert I felt you were the right person to help with my problem

AgonyAuntPosterCat

I’ll try to be brief, the other night on asking my Beloved to fill the washing machine, and set the timer I was greeted by an unholy commotion, Beloved had heeded my request, and being a wise man had come to the conclusion that he would put his daily attire in said machine, so being now only as nature intended, our unruly K9 made a lunge for and indeed captured Beloveds boxer shorts, I entered the room to find my husband of many years … naked …. wrestling  k9 on the floor for his undergarments, is this normal behaviour or is my Beloved having some sort of mid-life crisis

Thank you in advance for you advice

Bewildered of Lincolnshire

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33 thoughts on “Agony Aunt Required

  1. that sounds like normal behavior to me … we had a wild chase for a pj-pant a couple of weeks ago. I grabbed it from the bathroom while my dad chased me..ina a half-birthday suit :o)

  2. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ……. (stop for belly ache) ……… ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha …… (some more belly ache…) …. ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ….. Oh,God,why oh why I wasn’t born in England and have the chance to being told this story in real life…..

      1. That’s great!!! Let’s be in touch!!! LOL The comments I’m reading here about the fight are so hilarious! I can only imagine how fun a talk about could be!

  3. Dear Bewildered of Lincolnshire: This is quite normal behaviour as they are simply fighting over who is going to load the washing machine. Your dog clearly feels a strong sense of duty to help out with routine chores, but your beloved is in confused because you asked him to do it. Not wishing to experience your wrath has put him in a position of conflict with your dog. The solution? Totally ignore them ……….. and may the best man (or dog) win! 🙂

    1. Dear Colinandray
      Thank you so much for your expert observations, perhaps I was a little forward asking Beloved to take responsibility for a job normally allocated at K9’s ability,
      I suppose Beloved is posturing for dominance and challenging K9’s Alpha status, I’ll take on board your advice and leave the 2 of them to resolve the situation

      1. An excellent plan. When they have resolved their differences, it might a good idea to pat them both gently on the head with the usual “Good boy” routine. i.e. Show no preference otherwise you may be encouraging a form of sibling rivalry.

      2. Beloved should probably be allowed on the sofa however, be alert to any signs that he is claiming ownership to any part of it. If that happens, then encourage K9 up and into Beloved’s spot.

  4. Dear Bewildered of Lincolnshire,

    Having read and reread (between bouts of tears from laughing) about the scene you set and the obvious distress this is causing you (not knowing if indeed Beloved has actually reached the MLC in one fell swoop) I have a couple of reasons perhaps why you were (un)lucky enough to witness said moment!
    1) Firstly, by the sound of things, Beloved (no disrespect) is not used to cramming the machine in the proficient manner you do yourself. His decision to fill the load as much as possible, was, no doubt in his mind, the right thing to do – regardless whether the sackcloth had been drawn at the windows, or not??! Combine this with, one K9, recent headgear removed, and add a need for some mischief and entertainment… innocent scenario!
    2) Secondly, perhaps, your Beloved has been reading about the naturist’s rugby gathering and, thought it might be a fun way of keeping fit in his spare time? It could be he was testing out his fitness with a quick tackle before deciding to commit LOL
    3) Thirdly, I’d rather not speculate further ;-/………..LOL….and, 6 o’clock isn’t far away now, I’m sure you’ll see things in a different light after then 😀
    4) My final conclusion is……that by causing so much disruption and worrying uncertainties he has now got himself banned from having to do any more washing in the machine – a reverse psychology move???

    My best advice….Keep a close eye on him 😉

      1. Apparently so ;-/ having typed in nude rugby I shielded my eyes from the mammoth results list – daring NOT to open any of the informative pages LOL
        If you’ve not already got a similar pouring device, I hope you have put an order in for the delightful little pot?? 😉

      2. Said pouring device is way too expensive Beloved has offered to get me a white teapot and a marker pen, as for a nude rugby google search I’m sure as L not going down that road I’m much to sensitive LOL

  5. That’s quite funny. ha! My dad didn’t have that adventure tackling the washing machine as that but when I was in primary school he rang up and ask to speak to me. (Way before I was allowed a phone) He askd me how do use the washing machine and one time he rang me again when I was in college and asked how to use the dish washer when my mum was at work. hahaha!

  6. Dear Bewildered
    Pay no heed. This is just a cunning ploy (probably cooked up by beloved and K9 together) to avoid housework. It is possible that their antics will become more extreme over coming weeks, but do not rise to them. Do not laugh – it will only encourage them. Remain strong and continue to set tasks to be completed. Eventually they will realise that the plan has not worked and will meekly do your bidding.
    In the mean time, I suggest that you keep the garden gate shut, front door locked and curtains closed at a ll times.
    Regards
    Aunty Snail

    1. Dear Aunty Snail
      Many thanks for your prompt reply,
      I shall heed your common sense advice to the letter, I’m sure your column in the local newspaper has received such letters in the past, and no doubt you have heard it all before, but I visibly crumbled faced with such a sight, with the knowledge it is all a ploy I shall resume the delegation of tasks and if I need your advice in the future I shall not hesitate to contact you
      Kindest Regards
      Bewildered Of Lincolnshire

      1. Fun, tiring, sometimes messy (I’m sure I could stuff a sofa with all the fur my 2 pets shed) but the love, and cuddles more than makes up for everything

    1. Dear Mrs S
      I will take comfort in you reply that I’m not the only person faced with traumatic incidences, however unnerving at the time
      Yours Mrs P

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